In early sobriety I would tell myself “I hate being sober!” but I had no choice. Sure, I could choose to use drugs or alcohol but negative consequences would pile up. There are a lot of people who are forced into sobriety. Some of them have hit rock bottom, some are on probation, some are forced to by their caretaker. Regardless of your reasoning behind being sober, you don’t have to be miserable. There are ways to become reasonably happy without drugs or alcohol.
Why did I hate being sober?
I hated being sober because it was boring. I didn’t really know what else to do outside of drugs and alcohol. Also, I hated the social circle of “straight edge” people. People who didn’t do drugs were usually bragging about what school they got into or how much money they make as if that made them better than. When they’d get together in groups they’d seem excessively fake. They’d go out to eat laughing at their own lame jokes. I much preferred the party atmosphere, not only was it exciting but people seemed more interesting and humble. We’d laugh about the stupid things we could do and just blame it on being high. We would feel like we were bonding as we spoke jibberish to each other. We would try new drugs together. Get enough war stories to write an amusing book.
Why do I love being sober?
Little did I know I was living in a box within my addiction. My whole life revolved around the substances, from my social circle to how I spent my free time. You take the substance away and it’s like taking away all I know. I didn’t know that there was a whole world out there to explore. I didn’t realize there’s cool people who don’t use drugs and I could pick and choose who to hangout with. It took some time and effort to adjust, but after time I found hobbies, interest, passions, and a vision for how I wanted my life to turn out. Since then I’ve picked up rapping, shooting at gun ranges, bowling, being a entrepreneur, being in digital marketing as a career, getting a degree etc. What’s great is my joy is shareable with others. I can share my music with a stranger, I can sell my products to customers, I can make businesses successful online. My joy is more long-term and makes sense. Before all I had to be happy about was a chemical alteration to my brain chemistry. All I had to show for it was an empty bank account.
It may take time to adjust, I used drugs for 6 years. Learning to love being sober isn’t going to happen over night. It’s also not going to happen without effort. If you try your best and are patient, with time, sobriety will be something you’re grateful for. All change sucks, but getting off drugs is a positive change. I hope this helps if you struggle with the mentality “I hate being sober”.
Philip Markoff (Associate of Science) is an online influencer and thought leader on addiction education; he is known as his alias “CG Kid” who’s obtained a large audience primarily on YouTube as a vlogger and journalist. His current sobriety date from polysubstance chemical dependency is June 9th, 2013.